Dateworks Matchmakers Put Self-Love at the Center of Dating

The Short Version: Love can be hard to find, so singles in Malaysia lean on Dateworks Matchmaking for some help. Joanne Ng launched Dateworks in 2017 to teach singles how relationships really work. Today, the team pairs singles based on compatibility and common values. The matchmakers at Dateworks help clients figure out what's getting in their way in dating and get past the obstacles in their love lives.

The relationships in our lives can shape who we become. That's why it sometimes makes sense to call in a pro to help you meet the right partner. Some singles are too busy for online dating and count on matchmakers to make the process simpler.

A matchmaker brings together people whose personalities fit and whose life goals line up. Professionals take care to introduce people who will truly complement each other exactly as they are. Now and then a relative informally takes on the matchmaker role; other times, people bring in paid pros such as the Dateworks Matchmaking team in Malaysia.

“I was always interested in terms of human relationships, as well as human interactions,” said Gwen Lau, now a matchmaker with Dateworks in Malaysia.

When the unusual job opening came up, Lau knew it was a natural fit for her. “After learning what they do, I found it quite interesting,” she told us. “It is a very meaningful journey because we see how people feel about the relationships, how they are as people.”

She can tell who would pair well and who would face too many incompatibilities to last over the long term.

How Did Dateworks Begin?

Joanne Ng, one of Malaysia's leading matchmakers, founded Dateworks. The company launched in 2017, and at first its team worked one-on-one with individuals. Dateworks provides a wide range of services. Personalized matchmaking is the popular pick, and there's also cross-border matchmaking, an ideal option for singles who want to meet someone in another country.

Joanne serves as Dateworks' founder and CEO.

Dateworks offers virtual matchmaking, too, much like what you might find online these days. Picture something like Match, except a professional sits beside you and handles the hard work.

“Our founder, Joanne, started off with the intention of educating people about relationships,” Lau explained. “I would say in Asian cultures, overall, no one really taught us about relationships. You have to stumble across and explore yourself. So that was her main intention.” Later, the company expanded into matchmaking.

Gwen Holds Nothing Back in Her Matchmaking Approach

For clients, the Dateworks matchmaking process is simple. “It starts with a very tailored approach,” Lau said. At the first session, clients answer in-depth questions from the matchmaker about who they are.

“This session allows us to understand their personality, their family backgrounds, their hobbies, interests, and of course, most importantly, what they strive to learn in a relationship,” she explained. 

The services Ng and Lau offer are badly needed. According to Lau, many young singles focus more on their careers, and conversations about sex and love can still be viewed as taboo. “It is improving,” she said, though she noted there are still “lots to learn.”

Dateworks matchmakers sift through potential matches on their clients' behalf.

Lau also makes a point of discussing boundaries with clients. “We want to understand what our candidates think about acceptable actions during a relationship before we look through and filter matches for them,” she said.

All of that helps make sure both people feel comfortable in the relationship. For a romantic match to last, it's important to find compatibility between people whose backgrounds and perspectives differ.

Over her career, Lau has learned plenty about what keeps many singles stuck. The Dateworks site puts it this way: “Most coaches ascertain that during a session where clients talk about their backgrounds, they exhibit these common mistakes: they work too much, they are too shy, too introverted, too fussy, too picky, too routine, too restricted and ultimately, the worst mistake of all, they give up on love.”

Part of Lau's role is talking with each client to pinpoint what might be setting them back. With that knowledge, clients can work on themselves first and then on finding a compatible match.

Dateworks Wants Clients to Love Themselves First

Dating is hard for some singles because they never learned to love themselves. “For us, it is also very important to guide them through the process, so to learn how to value yourself and know what you want,” Lau said. “And then you talk about loving others.”

People need to recognize how much they have to offer before they can find their best match. That idea is worth putting into practice even if you never use a matchmaking agency. Rather than putting yourself down, focus on what makes you one of a kind. If you can't see what sets you apart, others may have an even harder time seeing how wonderful you are.

Each client works closely with a matchmaker.

Still, confidence isn't always easy to come by, so getting help is a plus. The Dateworks team draws on coaching methods to help clients feel good about themselves. Beyond talking with its singles, Dateworks offers standout extras like grooming advice and wardrobe styling so they can feel their best.

Matchmakers help young singles fully recognize their value and understand what to expect from a healthy relationship. Lau and the other skilled matchmakers at Dateworks work to give every connection they make the best possible shot at lasting a lifetime.

Bringing in an outside party to show you where your search for love might be stalling can often teach you something about yourself.

Matchmakers do more than help set up dates; they also help clients see why they deserve a happy, meaningful connection. Without that understanding, any relationship, and a romantic one most of all, would be hard to sustain.

Singles Review Each Other's Profiles Before Taking the Next Step

Lau handles the heavy lifting behind the scenes, but the singles she works with never walk into a new situation blind. They have a say in who they date. “We match them based on compatibility, and then we will share a profile with them,” Lau said. Once both people agree to give it a shot, the matchmakers set up a date, either virtual or in person.

With the agency's growth, in-person dates have become trickier to arrange. Lau said many clients are Malaysian, but a few are expats who come from Canada, Europe, Singapore, or Taiwan.

Lots of people would rather connect online before traveling far to meet face-to-face. Dateworks understands that people have different dating preferences and tries to accommodate a range of situations.

Different personal preferences also come with different attitudes about dating. Plenty of clients are open to trying new things, but some may feel reserved or be too scared to step outside their comfort zones.

Singles come to Dateworks for its matchmakers' experience.

Lau's experience has given her plenty of advice to share. “Definitely be more open minded,” she said. The process can be nerve-racking, but she stresses that nerves at the start are completely normal.

“I realized people tend to be very worried, okay, like, am I going to say the wrong thing like is the person’s going to be a good match. So it’s normal. But we definitely hope that people can be more accepting,” she said. 

“Accept your vulnerability,” Lau went on. She believes in taking a lesson from every interaction, even the ones that don't lead to true love. Practice makes communicating easier, and the more you embrace your vulnerability, the more at ease you'll feel.

Shedding Light on Why So Many People Stay Single

Investing in yourself can be tough, particularly if you feel unworthy. After a long stretch of being single, remind yourself what makes you a catch. Don't shy away from working on yourself daily, and seek out hobbies and activities that bring you joy.

Everyone has compatible people out there, but a professional's help can sometimes ease the pressure of the search.

When dating feels overwhelming, Dateworks can help. Its professionals provide positive support and valuable introductions that change singles' lives.

“Meeting people means there’s a chance. There’s an opportunity to have a connection,” Lau said.